Three COBOL Hackers
Lyrics Copyright 1983, 1984 Stephen Savitzky.  CC by-nc-sa/4.0.
        To the tune of ``Three Whores of Winnipeg'' (traditional).

C
Three COBOL programmers quarrelled
    F                  C
One night in the local bar
C
Each one claimed that his payroll job
    G7                C
Was fastest of all by far.


       C
    So number your decks, you hackers
        F                    C
    The keypunch is down the hall
    C
    Bring on the bugs, you lazy slugs,
    G7                     C
    Mine's the quickest of all.

The first said ``Mine is the quickest
It's obvious at first sight
We load up the tapes on Wednesday noon
And finish by Thursday night.''

The second said ``Mine is faster
The database stays on line
We fire it up at eight am
And finish by half-past nine.''

The third one said ``You pikers,
You're starting your runs too soon--
The job that we run in the morning's done
By the previous afternoon.''



Online:
    http://Steve.Savitzky.net/Songs/three/lyrics.chords.txt

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